Desperate Measures
by realismandromance
Summary: Desperate times call for desperate measures. Partnerless days before the Yule Ball, and goaded by a bet with Ron, Harry rashly asks out the next girl he sees. The result is a date with the very strange Luna Lovegood. [AU: Canon Divergence]


_[Dedicated to Jessica (KeepCalmAndWriteSomething)]_

* * *

Desperate Measures

Snow covered the Hogwarts grounds in an immaculate blanket of white, the prefects had assisted in decorating the twelve tall Christmas trees in the Great Hall, and practically every single fourth-year and above already had a date to the Yule Ball. At least, that was how it seemed to Harry and Ron, who had foolishly and regrettably neglected to find partners suitably quickly, with the result that it was now days before Christmas, and their prospects of saving social image trickled away with each passing hour.

'We'll be the laughing-stock,' said Ron glumly after dinner, throwing himself into a squashy common-room armchair with a loud groan, which caused several girls nearby to titter. 'See?'

'It'll be all right for _you_,' Harry said darkly. 'You don't _need_ to have a date. I don't have a choice about being paraded up the front like a horse at a show.'

'Tell you what,' said Ron, sounding desperate, 'the first person to get a date gets to take the mickey out of the other -'

'You'd do that anyway,' said Harry.

'Yeah, but the other has to ask out Pansy Parkinson,' finished Ron triumphantly. 'It's not like she'd actually say yes. Five Knuts that she's already going with Malfoy anyway.'

'I'm not taking that up.'

'But the bet?' Ron pressed.

Harry sighed. 'OK, fine. I'll do it. You'd better not have some stupid trick up your sleeve.'

Ron only grinned.

* * *

It was too bad that once you got to fourth year, the teachers decided that stress-free holidays were for weaklings and instead inflicted an unhealthy amount of homework, Harry thought. On his way back to the common room that evening, he was so wrapped up in worry about critical homework levels and other issues (he still hadn't secured a date) that he didn't notice when he walked straight into a blur of black and dirty-blonde. Snapping back to reality, he glanced down at who he'd inadvertently knocked over. This turned out to be a Ravenclaw girl with long tangled hair, wide blue eyes and ... radish earrings? Harry blinked.

'_You're_ Harry Potter,' she said in a dreamy, detached sort of voice, looking up at him with her head tipped to one side, which emphasised the earrings. There was a purple ink smudge on her chin and a fluffy quill tucked over one ear.

'Oh ... yeah,' said Harry stupidly, startled. Trying to salvage the situation, he pulled her to her feet. She looked familiar - he'd probably seen her around at Hogwarts - but no name came to mind. 'And you're ... you're ... who _are_ you?'

'Luna Lovegood. Well, I must be going,' she added brightly. 'Somebody took my last pair of shoes, and I really do need them if I want to go out in the snow, so I've been asking people if they've seen them. It was nice to meet you, Harry Potter.' She turned around and began skipping barefooted down the corridor, humming to a tune of her own.

'Wait!' Harry called after her - what possessed him to do it, he didn't know. She slowed down and he chased her and caught up. 'Er ... I don't suppose you're going to the ball?' he said, without much hope. Still, he had to ask - he didn't want another incredibly stilted conversation like the one he'd had with Cho.

'Oh, no,' she said. 'I'm not old enough to go by myself, and no one asked me. Daddy invited me to come home for Christmas, but I decided to stay here. I've never spent the holidays at Hogwarts before.'

Not knowing what to say to this, and casting about for something that wasn't rude or insensitive, the words came out before he could help himself. 'D'you want to go with me, then?' When she didn't say a word, only her protuberant eyes becoming bigger and rounder, he added hastily, 'As friends, I mean ...'

'To the Yule Ball! As friends! I've never been invited to a ball before, as friends!'

'Is that a yes?' he said cautiously.

She nodded vigorously, a huge smile on her face, then spun around and skipped away. Harry watched her bouncing curls disappear around the corner, then mentally shook himself. What had come over him?

He stayed in this dazed state all the rest of the walk to Gryffindor Tower, and was only vaguely aware of spotting Ron and Hermione at a table and sitting down with them.

'Are you OK?' Hermione asked, looking up from the essay she was working on and frowning at him.

'I'm fine,' he said, without any thought or confidence in what he was saying. Shaking out of it, he turned to Ron. 'I did it.'

'Did what?' said Ron.

'The dare.'

'What dare?' Ron looked thoroughly confused.

'You know,' said Harry, feeling very much like slapping Ron around the head. 'The last to get a date to the ball has to ask out Pansy Parkinson.'

Ron looked puzzled, then burst into laughter, much to Harry's annoyance. 'You prat, I wasn't being serious,' he choked out, when he could speak again. 'You think I'd risk having to do that?'

'Well, how was I supposed to know?' retorted Harry, trying to cover up how stupid he felt. 'Anyway, you can go by yourself if you like, but McGonagall more or less told me to find a partner or else.'

'Never mind that,' said Hermione briskly, who had abandoned her essay and leant closer. 'Who did you ask, Harry?'

'Er ...' He could feel himself turning red. Ron lowered his voice.

'Is she in our year?'

'I don't know,' he said, regretting everything.

'Is she in Gryffindor?'

'No,' he said, certain of this at least. 'Ravenclaw.'

Hermione frowned. 'Didn't Cho already -'

'Yeah, she did,' muttered Harry. 'This is someone else.'

'C'mon, you can tell us her name,' wheedled Ron. 'Unless it's not a her. Is it? Tell me you asked a girl out, Harry.'

'I - yes, she's a girl!' He was affronted. 'As if you can talk! Going to be right lonely on Christmas Day, aren't you?'

'Actually,' said Hermione loftily, 'he's going with Parvati. I wouldn't worry about him, Harry,' she added, ignoring Ron's splutters with admirable composure. 'It's none of his business whom either of us take to the ball, and he'll find out soon enough anyway.' Sweeping her books and parchment into her bag, she stood up. 'I'm off to bed.'

This statement, delivered with implied confidence in Harry's ability to choose a suitable date, only served to make him look back on his actions of the last hour with increasing horror. What had he been thinking, to ask a girl he'd never spoken to before and who was decidedly eccentric, judging from those radish earrings?

At five o'clock in the afternoon on Christmas Day, Hermione stood up from watching Harry and the Weasleys' snowball fight and announced that she had to go get ready for the ball, a fact that Ron lost no time in spluttering to Harry about.

'What does she need three hours for? Look,' (this was whispered with a great deal of suspicion) 'I reckon she made it all up to hide that no one's asked her. Why else would she not tell us?'

Harry could think of several answers to this question, but he doubted that Hermione's reason was sheer mortification, like his. She was usually good at that kind of stuff. He, on the other hand ...

Two hours later, when the light was fading and it was getting harder to throw snowballs decently, Harry and the others trooped inside to get ready for the ball, some more enthusiastic than others. Ron in particular was not satisfied with his decidedly mouldy and dress-like dress robes.

'This ball's more trouble than it's worth, honestly. Who're you going with, by the way?' he added in an undertone. 'C'mon, you can tell me, I won't laugh.'

Very much doubting this last statement, Harry only said, 'You'll find out.'

Looking disappointed, Ron settled for hacking away at the lace collar of his robes with a couple of ill-placed Severing Charms.

Parvati met Ron in the common room; Harry, however, had to meet Luna in the Entrance Hall, so the three of them trooped down together. A crowd of students were already there, waiting for their partners from other houses.

'Where's Hermione?' said Ron, trying to peer over people's heads. Parvati gave him a disgruntled look and dragged him away.

'Hello, Harry!' said someone, right in Harry's ear. He spun round, almost tripping on his dress robes, to see none other than Luna Lovegood behind him.

'Hi,' he said lamely.

'Oooh, isn't it exciting!' she said loudly, causing several people nearby to spot her with Harry and stare. She was wearing what appeared to be hundreds of green and brown squares sewn together in order to masquerade as dress robes. Every square was different - some shimmering, some ragged, some pale, some dark, some with gold thread interlaced - and there were many layers, causing the robes to fluff around her like a feathers of a bird. She had even woven strips of cloth through her hair. Looking closer, Harry was sure he could see traces of gold glitter on her face, like freckles. The radish earrings were gone, but in their place were acorns. Where had she got them, in the middle of winter? She looked like nothing so much as a tree decked out for autumn. He was relieved to see that she wasn't barefoot - she must have been able to find some shoes somewhere, or maybe somebody had returned them.

Glancing around, Ron caught sight of Harry and Luna together and goggled, then gave Harry a look that was mixed exasperation, hilarity and ... pity? But before he and Parvati could make their way back through the crowd, Professor McGonagall called the champions and their partners aside, and Harry and Luna made their way past whispers and giggles to where the others were standing. There were Cedric and Cho, Fleur and Roger Davies, and Krum and ... Hermione? Her signature bushy hair was now smooth and sleek and pulled back in a bun, and her posture in her periwinkle-blue robes was unfamiliar - she gave off a vibrant aura of confidence and happiness.

'Hi, Harry!' she called, waving. Her eyes lingered on Luna's bizarre outfit for the briefest moment. 'Hi, Luna!'

The doors of the Great Hall opened, and all the students except for the champions and their partners filed in. Then Professor McGonagall called the rest inside, and they trooped past the whole school up to the top table.

After dinner, during which both Harry and Luna received a number of double takes and Luna wasted no time in talking to Madame Maxime about Crumple-Horned Snorkacks ('A lot of people say they don't exist, but Daddy says it'll only be a matter of time before we find one'), the champions had to start the first dance. Missing their cue until it was almost too late, Harry nudged Luna away from her animated conversation and pulled her out onto the dance floor.

Since neither Harry nor Luna had any idea how to dance (the way they were supposed to, anyway), they both attracted a number of sniggers as Harry tried to covertly copy Cedric and Cho's steps without anyone noticing. Fortunately, more and more people joined in dancing, giving Harry a chance to relax and stop staring at his shoes to keep from tripping over them.

When the opening dance finished, Harry led Luna over to a table, out of the centre of attention. However, the song quickly changed to a more upbeat number. Luna clapped her hands.

'This was my mum's favourite song,' she announced. 'D'you want to dance?'

Jolted out of a reverie, Harry shrugged.

'Wrackspurts got to you?' she said sympathetically. 'Never mind, I'll go by myself.' She left him and began to tip her head from side to side and twirl around on the dance floor, causing her robes to puff out and flutter around her.

While Harry was watching her, Dean and Seamus, having temporarily abandoned their partners, came over to him.

'Are you mental?' said Dean incredulously.

His contented mood destroyed, Harry snapped, 'What're you on about?' He wished he could hex Dean's legs together without anybody noticing.

'You asked Loony Lovegood to the Yule Ball, when you could have asked anyone? _Loony Lovegood_?'

'Shut up.' It certainly wasn't true that he could have gone with anyone, he thought wryly, or Cho Chang would be with him instead of Pretty-Boy Diggory. 'It's none of your business.'

'C'mon, mate, you don't have to defend her,' said Seamus bracingly. 'Just a shock, is all. I mean, _Loony Lovegood_ ...'

'I said shut up! And don't call her that.' Suddenly aware of how he sounded, he said quickly, 'Where's Ron?'

'In his usual state,' said Dean, gesturing to another table, where Ron seemed to be having a very heated argument with Hermione. 'Well, have fun with your date, Harry,' he added, smirking, as the Weird Sisters struck up a new song and he and Seamus returned to their partners.

Maybe Luna wasn't so bad after all, thought Harry, as he watched her move around on the dance floor, swaying to a rhythm of her own. Yes, she was odd, but people had called him that plenty of times before in his life, and he'd wasn't bothered by it. There were much worse things in life to be than strange, and it made him glad, after all, that Ron had tricked him with a silly 'bet', causing him to ask out a girl he'd never met before and spend Christmas night with Luna Lovegood.

* * *

_[Secret Santa by Screaming Faeries]_


End file.
